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Creating a romantic gesture? Knowing as much as possible about your heartmate is crucial.

“I’ve been married 19 years and I just found out my husband likes mustard on his sandwiches!” tweeted author Sheila Gregoire. I had to chuckle at that but, inspired by her honesty, I asked my wife “Is there anything like that that I should know about?” Thinking for a moment, she politely replied “Well, you do put too much milk on my cereal.” Hmm… I’ve been flubbing the cereal for 28 years? Who knew!

I realize these are small tweaks in the grand scheme of things, but they are indicative of a romantic paradox verified in a study published in the Journal of Consumer Psychology (August 2010). According to the authors “Our results indicate that older couples had lower accuracy in predicting each other’s preferences than younger couples even though older couples in our study had spent an average of 40 years longer together.” They go on to describe many possible explanations for the discrepancy, but, to summarize; it basically comes down to an assumption problem. We assume we know too much about our heartmate. Continue Reading…

The “To Know” List

July 26, 2011 — 2 Comments
What follows is a list of information that I’d recommend you know about your heartmate. Having the list with you either in your memory, phone or wallet can help ensure your spur of the moment romantic gestures are spot on.

Knowing Your Heartmate

March 13, 2011 — 1 Comment

I’m going to expand on this more in the future, but one of the essentials for creating romantic gestures is knowing your heartmate. Below are a few surveys that I believe are important:

  1. The Five Love Languages – We often give what we like to get and sometimes that isn’t optimal for our heartmate. This test is essential to refining your romantic gestures.
  2. Compatibility Quiz from the book “Attached.” – Take the Quiz here.
  3. Jung Typology Test – Note that a true Myers-Briggs test is meant to be administered & interpreted by a trained professional. However, this test will do a reasonable job of evaluating whether or not your heartmate has introvert or extrovert tendencies.

Have some fun getting to know each other with these tests. Do you know of any other tests that have helped you and your heartmate deepen your connection?